Reflections on 30

Now, before everyone starts acting all crazy and reminding me that I'm not turning 30 until March, hear me out.  One of my best friends, Brandy turned 30 this weekend and had a difficult time with it.

A few nights before leaving out of town to go celebrate with her, I was watching Julie and Julia with my other best friend, Meagan. It was during the part where they were celebrating her 30th birthday that I turned to Meg and said, " There is no way that I would consider those people my peers. Do we really look/act/have lives that are similar to those 30 year olds in the movie?" Meg agreed that she would not put herself in the same group, that neither of us feel as old as we apparently are. Now, it's possible that half of those actors are really like 10 years older than they say and that will make me feel a smidge better:) But with all this "30 talk" surrounding me this weekend, it has got me thinking about my life, where I am, where I thought I'd be, and where i'm going.

If you had asked me when I was 18(this is me and friends at about 18, maybe 17) where I saw myself when I was getting ready to be 30, well first I probably would've crinkled my nose and thought quietly to myself "30?? why worry about that, it will be FOREVER before i get to that age!" But I would've said out loud that I would've been married, with probably 2 kids by that time, maybe staying home with them, maybe not.  Fast forward to college, same question. "Married, maybe just 1 kid with another on the way". Annndddd move to 26 years old, ..."I Have no idea". haha! Funny how things change. When we're in different seasons of life, we always think we have things figured out but that it typically when God is quietly tapping on our shoulder, trying to get our attention and we are too busy swatting away the annoying "fly" on our shoulder while trying to make our plans. 

I have enjoyed and got to experience so much in these last 10 years of "independence". I'm not saying it would've been bad to marry right after college but I also think God did a lot to develop me and develop my sense of self in Him in these past several years. I've gotten to enjoy trips and things I never would've had I been married with babies. I have met some amazing people and formed lasting friendships. I have gotten to live with my best friend for 2 years, something we always wanted to do and turns out we're pretty good roommates together! That is not always the case, even with the best of friends. 

I've got to be a part of a church that has allowed me to use my gifts as well as meet some fabulous new friends that always keep me laughing and keep a trophy in my hand (ha! we'll see how many boys actually read this because i'm sure they will have something to say about that! but there is the proof above) I've enjoyed so many things during this chapter in my life! And while i'm not closing the door on all of it, I am excited to see what new roles will be played in this new chapter.


So, if you were to ask me today where I think I will be when I'm 30, I guess my answer would be ..."married to an amazing, Godly man, living in Europe, and thinking about having babies in the future, blessed beyond measure with great friends, great family, and an adventurous life that is more than I could've dreamt up myself at 18."

 I miss him.